1. Keep talking amicably with your former partner. This might sound obvious, but it is one of the ways of assisting you to resolve any disputes between you.

2. Get comprehensive advice early. You may need advice on child or children’s matters, child support, property settlement, divorce and spouse maintenance amongst other things, depending on your circumstances.

3. Consider alternative dispute resolution measures. Ask your adviser to let you know the alternative dispute resolution options that may best suit your circumstances.

4. Listen to your adviser.

5. Treat your property settlement as a commercial transaction, as best you can. Undertake a cost-benefit analysis, before taking any steps along the negotiation or litigation path.

6. Jointly seek the input of a psychologist experienced in the field who can assist you in understanding how best to assist your children through the process.

7. Look for solutions that may accommodate both of your needs.

8. Understand the process and be proactive in moving through the necessary steps. Ask your lawyer what you can do to help to move things forward.

9. Getting advice from an expert on a tax or other question, or a valuation could be worth considering to help you move through an impasse.

10. Keep up good connections with friends and family.

Published 8th July 2014